


You Want Snails With That?

by Ononymous



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Gen, Post-Undertale Pacifist Route
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-01
Updated: 2018-02-01
Packaged: 2019-03-12 06:45:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13541904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ononymous/pseuds/Ononymous
Summary: When Asriel needs some money fast, he engages in the time honoured tradition of teenage employment.





	You Want Snails With That?

The cat adjusted his clip-on tie as his eyes darted from the application form to the applicant sitting on the cheap chair. The supplied photograph had the same nervous grin as the young man before him. His horns were a little longer however. Rookie mistake kid, gotta keep your headshots as up to date as possible.

"So, buddy," he said, "tell me what you think you can contribute to MTT™ Burger."

The nervous grin widened. "Well golly, I can work hard. My mom always said I have a great smile, so I can keep the customers cheery by smiling at them. And I never give up, I'm determined to get the job done!"

Good spread of answers, the manager mused. He'd have mentioned his obvious can-do attitude and the flaw of caring too much about perfection, but that was a matter of personal preference more than anything. "Can't complain about your attitude, kid. But what unique skills do you have?"

"...fire magic..."

His ears perked up. "So I can skip training you on the grill?"

"Do I get a raise for that? Hee hee..."

Something not unlike sympathy was on his face. "Sorry buddy, no can do. Corporate policy. No can do. You still want the job?"

"Oh, of course! I want to save up for, well..." His voice tailed off. Ah, one of those. Well might as well use him while he can.

"One more question then: Your application form's a little vague on the details. And your name is scribbled out."

The grin vanished, leaving its nervousness behind. "Oh, uh, I thought that was the address form."

"You didn't fill that out either."

"Oh, didn't I? Well I live at..." he became intensely interested in the ceiling for a moment. "Twelve Aslaud Lane."

He watched his future employer scribble down the fake address without question. "And your name?"

"Oh, I'm Aaaaaaaaaas... tor... isk... ara... gor... iel. Sleepurr."

"Astoriskaragoriel Sleepurr." He uncritically copied it down. "Hmm, that might not fit on the name tag. How about I shorten it, call you, I dunno, Asriel or something?"

"N-no! I mean, um, my friends call me... Gorey." The teenager clutched his mouth in embarrassment as the form was filled out.

"Welcome to the MTT™ Family, Gorey. Take my advice, don't avail of the staff discount. Bring your own lunch."

* * *

"Howdy, welcome to MTT™ Burger, my name is Gorey, can I take your order?"

The name he'd leapt into had been the biggest misstep of this whole plan so far, and once he got past using his father's pet name the job itself wasn't that bad, maybe a little boring. But Asriel needed more money than his allowance provided, and since it involved an important present for the upcoming anniversary, he couldn't risk being questioned for why he wanted an advance. Hence all the secrecy. Frisk, fully supporting the proposed present, mercifully provided cover, currently hanging out with Sans and Papyrus and bribing them into acting like he was there too, with the very same staff discount he'd been advised not to touch. As he operated the drive-thru, he was discovering a possible downside of this scheme at that very moment.

"'sup, 'gorey'. can i get a glamburger with fries?"

"Sure! You want some ketchup with that?"

"are you currently lying to your parents about what you're doin' with your free time?"

"Yeah. No! I mean- Cut it out!"

"just kidding, cap."

"CAN I ALSO GET A FACE STEAK AND CINNAMON BUNS?"

"Um, sorry Papryus-"

"that's 'mister papyrus sir', kid."

His nostrils wrinkled. "Sorry sir, but cinnamon buns were a limited offer. We're out of stock."

"CURSES! THEN I'D LIKE METTATON'S PARTIALLY GELATINATED NON-DAIRY GUM-BASED BEVERAGE. BANANA FLAVOUR!"

"Banana... milkshake... Anything else, sir?"

"Yeah," said a third voice, "can I get a medium portion of snails, no salt, and a diet sea tea?"

"Frisk? I thought you didn't like snails."

"Normally I don't, but whatever seasoning is on the glitter brings out the flavour. I think Napstablook suggested it when Mettaton started selling them."

"Huh, okay. Well that'll be twelve forty four – oh right, the discount – that'll be eleven eighty one, please proceed to window three to collect your order."

Ten minutes later Asriel handed over a shocking pink bag with their order to Papyrus, who in turned handed it to Sans so he could receive the drinks.

"THANK YOU, GOREY, YOUR SERVICE IS IMPECCABLE!"

"Uh, Papyrus, it's Asriel."

"I KNOW IT IS, BUT I'M NOT SO PRESUMPTIVE AS TO DEVIATE FROM HIS NAME TAG. THAT'S JUST RUDE!"

"'s pretty thoughtful of you, bro. and bein' thoughtful's the _name_ of the game."

Four eyes and two sockets glowered at him until Papyrus finally drove away. Well, that wasn't too bad.

* * *

"Those glamburgers ready yet, Gorey?"

"In a minute, Chuck!"

Copying how he'd seen his mother do it countless times, Asriel hovered his hands over the grill, hearing the sizzle as the pink burgers were engulfed in flame. It certainly smelled correct, but compared to the more pedestrian meat Toriel would cook, it was kind of hard to judge by sight when they were properly cooked. They just got more pink and glittery. In the end he found relying on the smell a better gauge than the appearance. Extinguishing the fire, he deposited the dozen patties onto the equally glittery buns, and watched Chuck pick them up in his tentacles to add the garnish.

"Hey, Sleepurr."

"Yeah, boss?"

"Sandra's on break, can you man the till? I gotta call my agent- I mean- check we paid head office for the licensing fee."

"Sure."

There wasn't much difference between the drive-thru and the main in-restaurant till, at least in terms of skills required It did however require more patience, for those who stood in line to order often lacked some of their own. A fish in a vest muttered dark aspersions about MTT Burger when Asriel handed over an order without a straw. And after that there was a complicated balancing act as a large rabbit family came in and nobody wanted the same thing, save for lettuce, and some of the children whined until they were at last permitted to go sit at a booth with their order. And then...

"Hey, I said no onions!"

"Sir, there are no onions. I double checked."

"Bull! What do you call these?"

"...tomatoes?"

"...really? Huh. No wonder my teacher said I failed the fruit and vegetable test."

Unable to help himself, Asriel retrieved a couple of slices of onion. "What do you think these are?"

"Uhhhhhhhhh, pineapple?"

His duty to educate the customer discharged, and discovering that actually he really liked onion on his burger, next up was a couple of humans. Far and away these were the politest customers at MTT Burger, for even several years after their emergence later it was a great Monster Tourist attraction to them to eat here. Today was no exception, although he panicked after they took a picture of "that nice goat working the till" and talking about posting it online. Determined to keep this project under wraps until the time was right, he spent a good five minutes begging them to delete it. And the project was coming together nicely. Despite having no official power to pay beyond what Mettaton mandated, Asriel's boss at least did not skim the tips, which apparently was strongly encouraged at other MTT restaurants. It was like he could sympathise with all the hard dreary work his employees did. After a few weeks he was already halfway there. Who knows, maybe after he got the money he might keep the job. With parental permission this time. And speaking of parents, a large duck approached the till with only one child compared to the regiment of bunnies.

"Howdy, can I take your order?"

"Yeah, can I get-"

"I want the toy I want the toy I want the toy!"

"In a minute, can I get a Legendary Hero, small fries, large soda-"

"Toy toy toy toy toy!"

"Hold on! And can I get an MTT Fabulous Meal with orange juice."

"Certainly, ma'am. And I assume your son wants the limited edition Mettaton figurine?"

"Yeah yeah yeah!"

"I don't know why you have the gall to call it limited, I don't think I've seen anything but Mettaton figurines."

"Oh? Well I wouldn't know, I'm new here. Do you want some snails with that?"

"Eww, no!"

"Manuel, don't be rude! No thank you Mister... Sleepurr. They're an acquired taste, and Wallace hasn't acquired it."

"I totally have! Give me snails!"

Ah, one of those kids. He'd encountered a few, and so far the hotplate had not gone untouched. "Well, the reason I offered is we can bundle snails in at no extra charge any time this week."

The triumph on Manuel's face sapped all resistance from his mother. "Oh, very well. But don't start complaining when you don't like the taste. I went through this rigmarole with Raffy when he was your age.

"Oh, with the cauliflower?" said Asriel automatically, "I heard he actually liked it and was just trying to save face."

"Well he likes it now, but... wait a minute, how do you know about that?"

Damn, he just had to throw that out. He'd picked it up when he, well, was trying to blossom. He'd been so careful not to rely on that era, how could he be such an idiot? Quick, invent a cover story.

"Oh, uh, I heard he confided it in his best friend, who told their cousin and let it slip to her sister and she told everyone at the algebra class at Mo- Miss Toriel's school, and the teacher's nephew was in here the other day." Phew, good luck tracing that to anyone real-

"Oh, you know dear young Lutris! I attend baking class with his mother. Did he behave himself?"

"Erm, well-"

"Where's the toy?!"

"Toy? Oh! One moment." Taking full opportunity to dodge the topic, he scooted around the kitchen collecting the various pieces of their order, including the rather overdesigned figurine. "Here you go ma'am. Have A Fabulous Day!"

The mother was satisfied, perhaps relieved, to get away from the insistent nagging of her son. Asriel watched them leave as Manuel dug around in the bag. Unfortunately he didn't extract a snail in time for Asriel to overhear whether he actually liked it.

* * *

"Look, Sleepurr. Gorey. Astoriskaragoriel . Nobody's saying you did anything wrong."

"Then why am I here?"

Asriel's boss took a few puffs of a cigarette, irritating his throat. "I get what you were going for, but humans don't get magic just yet. They kinda freaked out."

"At what? How else could I have cleaned the floor in time to get back to grilling the burgers? My dad taught me that trick."

"It's a pretty neat trick, but humans don't like seeing fire where fire shouldn't be. The grill, fine, they know you gotta cook it somehow, but fire on the floor scares them. Just... just stick with the mop next time, okay buddy?"

"Yes, sir."

"Look, you're doing a great job besides that."

"Golly, you say that a lot."

"...someone has to. Can't rely on your heroes to do it, so you gotta do it yourself."

The mild rebuke over, Asriel returned to reorganising the pantry, figuring out where to store the excess glamburger buns they received that morning. Then back on grill duty. He had to say he was admiring the nuances of the technique he had to develop to do this. Maybe he should get some tips from Grillby.

"Yo, Gorey, man the Drive-Thru a minute?"

"Sure, Sandra." He walked over and got the headset on, making sure it didn't slip because of the position of his horns. "Welcome to MTT™ Burger, my name is Gorey, can I take your order?"

"Gorey? That is... never mind. Hello, I have just finished up work at the school, and I noticed a booklet of coupons mailed to my house, so I thought I would like to try something. I would like to order a single glamburger, with double the amount of each kind of salad, and I would like to redeem the coupon for a complimentary portion of snails. And may I please have a cup of black coffee to accompany them? I wonder if I should order something for my children? No, they are with their friends today, I do not wish to intrude. So that will be a burger, a coffee and the free... snails... Hello? Is everything alright? You are rather quiet."

"..." said Asriel in a blind panic, before seizing a bottle of water to desperately try and restore some moisture to his mouth. "No, I'm fine," he said in a voice a good half octave deeper than usual. "So that's a superveggie glamburger, black coffee and free snails? Great, that'll be seven fifty two, I'll have your order at window one."

Toriel was unaccustomed to drive-thrus of any variety, but even she began to suspect something was off given how long she waited. A white furry hand took her money and coupon, and then handed over a pink bag.

"Thank you. Are you sure everything is alright?"

"Sure."

"Can I at least thank you in person? That electronic set up is so distancing."

"...alright..."

Her server finally emerged. Wearing dark sunglasses and a scarf wrapped around every inch of his head. Two lumps made her fancy her server had horns.

"Goodness, what an odd clothing choice!"

"...company policy. Keeps fur out of the food. Here at MTT™ Burger we pride ourselves on hygiene!"

"Ah," she nodded sagely, "well that makes sense. I must thank you once again, Gorey." She unmistakably looked thoughtful at the name.

"You're welcome, Mom."

"What was that, sorry?"

"I said you're welcome, ma'am."

She had a curious expression, but drove away regardless. Asriel desperately tried to extract his head from the scarf so he could breath properly. That had been close. Hopefully he wouldn't have to do that again.

"Welcome to MTT™ Burger, can I take your order?"

"Howdy! I just got a coupon for free snails..."

* * *

The family of four sat around the dinner table, plates admirably clean, the large pie having been whittled down to two slices everybody was too polite to claim. The contentment only a homecooked meal could bestow had erased all other worries. The smallest member looked around happily at the three furry muzzles presently at peace.

"I must say you've outdone yourself, Toriel," said Asgore. "The snails were quite interesting."

"I admit I was... inspired," she said. "In any case, if I cannot provide a good meal on today of all days, then I may as well give up. I am surprised you took so many, Frisk."

"Habits change," they shrugged.

"Indeed. A pity Undyne could not join us like last year, but I understand Doctor Alphys had that trip planned for months. Ah well, more for us to enjoy. My goodness, has it really been five years? This anniversary of when Asriel returned to us and-"

"Wait." Everyone looked to Asriel. "Before you say any more, I need to give you something."

His parents looked with interest as he got up and left the room, glancing at each other to confirm neither knew about this. A couple of minutes later he returned, carrying a large box in green and yellow wrapping paper.

"This is for you two. Open it!"

Toriel and Asgore looked at each other once more, then back to their eager son. The King took the lead, cautiously ripping the paper apart.

"Oh my, this is..."

On a base of purple gravel stood a model of an equally purple house with dark windows, and a small spattering of flowers. In the yard stood a dark tree with no leaves, all contained in a shimmering glass case.

"My goodness! Asriel, this is our house! Our house from the Underground!"

"Yeah. Alphys got me in touch with someone who would make it. Frisk and I went up to Mount Ebott to get photos for them to work on it, and then we commissioned the case from Temmie to add a little magical flare to it."

"Temmie? She does not take custom orders for free."

"Well, Temmie went to Temmie and helped us negotiate a discount, but you're right, it was pretty expensive. It's worth it, though."

"It's... an unusual present. But so beautiful as well," said Asgore. "Son, why did you feel the need to get us a present on your special day?"

He looked a little uncomfortable as he resolved to reveal his feelings. "Because... it's not just my day. Or at least it shouldn't be."

"What do you mean, Asriel?"

"Look. That day was amazing. I can't possibly say that enough. After everything I've- _We've_ been through, that we could come out the other side mostly together still kinda feels impossible. But over the years you two have focused on making it about me, and that kinda bothered me. Because yeah, I came back and you found me, but I also feel like I found you. And you found each other, even if it's not like before. And Frisk found all three of us. I don't need a day devoted to just me. I know things can't be like they were with everyone together, but I want to remember those times anyway, and celebrate the family we have now as well. We were about as shattered and broken as we could be, and, well..."

He couldn't find the words to finish his thoughts. A surprise hug from his father that threatened to crush him announced he didn't have to.

"You're right," said Asgore, "about a lot of things. We don't need to put you on a pedestal."

"I don't deserve a pedestal anyway."

"Do not talk like that, my son. Your perspective is true. We should celebrate not your rebirth, but the rebirth of the family. It is something we shall keep in mind for next year."

"Besides, there's always your birthday," said Frisk. Everyone laughed.

"Well said! Now then children, could you tend to the dishes? I suppose I need to decide where to place this wonderful gift."

The young human and monster obeyed, and soon only the model remained on the table. Asgore and Toriel's eyes darted from it to each other repeatedly, uncertainty heavy in the air. And then they were hugging, lightly nuzzling each other's noses.

"Hee hee," giggled Toriel, "'things cannot be as they were', indeed."

"Maybe this should be our gift to him," said Asgore mischievously, "that guitar can wait until his birthday."

"Perhaps. He is a surprising font of wisdom at times. Our relationship cannot just be about us, but about those we care about as well."

"...tomorrow, perhaps."

"Tomorrow morning, you mean?"

"Oh yes," he giggled.

"Oh yes indeed, Gorey!"

"Yeah?" called Asriel automatically.

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think, and thanks for reading!


End file.
